


Pizza Deliveries

by DragonSilk



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: Bad Flirting, Bad Pick-Up Lines, F/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-31 23:15:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8597626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonSilk/pseuds/DragonSilk
Summary: Delivering pizzas isn't the best job out there, but you'll take what you can get. (Don't get ideas, Dante.)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Right now, the website that hosted all of my older work is down. So I'm moving over anything that I happen to have saved. Please forgive this story as it is ancient and not up to current standards. 
> 
> It was written for a fic exchange. The prompt was "the edge of unreasonable". 
> 
> Enjoy~

It was your first night delivering pizzas, and you'd been given some of the worst jobs available. Since you were the 'new guy', everyone kept refusing to do assignments in the unsafe areas of town, forcing you to do them. You were surprised that the guys that you worked with would actually let a girl deliver pizzas in those areas, but it was just a sign that they were all jerks. They'd probably try to get into your pants later too.

At the moment, you were driving down a street lined with warehouses and one block down from the local strip joint. You were starting to worry that someone had called for a delivery to an empty warehouse so that they could attack and steal from you. Maybe you should be relying on more than just pepper spray. 

Then you saw a bright neon sign that read “Devil May Cry,” and you weren't sure if you wanted that to be the place or not. It wasn't an abandoned warehouse, but the sign was on the tacky side, and it looked like the windows were smashed in.

You were close enough to read the street numbers. It was the place. Well, at least it wasn't abandoned. That was something. 

You parked your car in front of the... to be honest you weren't even sure what it was. What kind of place would be located in a warehouse and called “Devil May Cry”? Maybe it was some sort of Halloween store... in April...

Whatever. It didn't matter. You just needed to deliver the pizza and collect your money.

You grabbed the pizza and walked up to the door. When you knocked on the door, it decided to creak open entirely on its own. Well that wasn't creepy at all.

“Hello?” you called out as you glanced into the warehouse.

The place was a complete pig sty! There were pizza boxes everywhere, clothes just piled on the floor, and substances of unknown varieties coating the walls and floors. Maybe it was a weird frat house of some sort...

Suddenly you found yourself looking at a very tall and very attractive blonde. She was dressed completely in leather and her clothes left very little to the imagination. She had the sort of body that most women would probably kill for, and based on the way that she was dressed, she knew it.

“Um, pizza.” You held up the pizza box, hoping that that would be enough of an explanation. You wondered why such an attractive woman was in a dump like this.

She rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath before yelling, “Dante! Your pizza is here, and I'm not paying for it!”

Then she slid past you and left without another word. You watched as she walked down the street. This really wasn't the safest place to be walking at night, but she didn't seem to be concerned at all. A cough caused your attention to snap back to the building you were standing in front of, and you found yourself staring directly at a very muscular chest.

Blushing you looked down at the pizza in your hands. “Basil and spicy salami pizza? Extra... no wait, sorry, no olives.”

A hand reached out and pulled the top of the pizza box open. You took that moment to glance up and found yourself staring at a man with the whitest hair you'd ever seen. It wasn't platinum blond, no it was white.

“Great.” The pizza apparently passed inspection because he took it from you. “Add it to my tab, babe.”

Wait a second! This might be your first night delivering, but you weren't born yesterday! You stuck your foot in the door to stop it from closing. “I think you should just pay me now.”

“Can't. Just add it to the tab.” He gave you a roguish grin. “Unless you'd like me to pay you in other ways. I can think of a few.”

You snatched the box back from him. “No money. No pizza.”

“Hey!”

You just turned and walked back to your car. Unfortunately, he followed behind you and stopped you from getting into the car. “Babe, we can work something out.”

“I don't know who you think you are, but I only accept cash or credit.”

He was still grinning, and you thought it was a little unnerving. You were already trying to keep your resolve in the face of such an attractive guy. His grin didn't help.

Then your phone started ringing. Keeping a careful eye on the attractive man in front of you, you shifted the pizza box so you could pull out your phone. “Hello?”

“What's taking so long? You should have been back from your delivery by now!”

Great. Just what you needed. A bad impression on your first day. “The guy is refusing to pay for his pizza?”

“Dante? He's an ass. He does that. Tell him we're adding interest to his tab.” Then your boss hung up on you.

Horrible impression on the first day complete. They really should have warned you about this guy in advance. With a reluctant sign, you gave the man the pizza box.

“I'm sorry about the mix-up. It's my first night working here.”

“No problem. How about you come inside, and I'll show you how you can make it up to me? The name's Dante.”

You nearly started laughing. You couldn't think of a single reason that would lure you into that guy's place. “I don't think being inside that place is even sanitary.”

“I might not have a genie to clean for me, but I could make your wishes come true.” He winked at you, and you just started laughing. That was the worst line you'd ever heard.

“I don't think so.” You got back into your car. The guy wouldn't pay for the pizza, and his place was a complete mess. It was unreasonable for him to think that you'd actually go inside with him.

Then again, he had the hottest body you'd seen for quite some time...

 


End file.
